medals | !INBOX // EUDIO.

jem can i ask you something
its not as personal and inappropriate as asking about night terrors
its a girl sort of thing
ive had input from blokes but i need a girls opinion

and youre sort of the only girlfriend i have here
i dont make friends with girls very well
it is quite personal actually
just tell me to sod off if you havent the time or dont care

ayup

everything alright?

have you ever asked a bloke out before
well its actually quite a bit more complicated than that

were already close mates and weve shagged and all that
and he says he loves me
but its in this very relaxed calm way
not dropping down on one knee and professing
just a fact that he wanted me to know and i could do with what i liked

so ive no idea what to make of him right now
and i dont want to make an arse of myself if ive taken him all wrong
and ive never been with a bloke at all, not like that

ive dropped quite a lot on you havent i
i think maybe i shouldve phoned

well my boyfriend didn't say he loved me but he bought me a cat and then i vomited my feelings onto him
but everything else is basically the same

so for once i am probably specifically qualified for this particular issue
this is a bit uncanny

alright this is just altogether unsuited for text
would you like to come over for tea
if im going to wring you dry about relationship details i should offer something
ive got jammie dodgers as well

i can never say no to a jammy dodger

youre free to as many as you like
this is a cheek after all
going straight from shopping an pubbing to romantic crises on the girlfriend scale

heres the address
ive got ferrets now and they smell a bit odd
but theyre sweet things

bless

i'll be about thirty minutes? if that's cool

that works for me
and bless you honestly
youre an angel for this

[As promised, she arrives thirty minutes later. She's started dressing for the colder weather coming in, so no crop top today.

She knocks on Celeste's door, idly glancing at her phone, and waits patiently. She may have also brought her own biscuits, to be polite. The bag hangs loosely from her wrist and sways with her when she rocks back onto her heels. ]

[Celeste's in leggings as well when she opens the door, houndstooth patterned today, with a henley shirt so oversized and shapeless that it's got to be a man's on top. Her hair's a bit mussed, and honestly, it looks like she's either just been napping or has aggressively been avoiding any sort of activity all day.

The night before was stressful, and today is proving even more so, with her thoughts in such a whirl. She hasn't gotten to the shower yet.

Two familiar ferrets try to skirt around her ankles immediately, but she nudges them back each time.]

Ah-ah, no, that's not for you, this is my guest. You'll have to make your own mates. Hello, Jem, and thanks again. [She gathers the wriggling bundles up to ensure there are no escapes, then steps aside to let her in.] Tea's steeping. Do come in.

[Ah yes, she's familiar with the great escape speed run. ] Hullo. I see they don't waste any time.

[She steps in, quickly shuts the door just in case and follows Celeste through. ] Bless them, they do try don't they?

They're mad things. I decided I'd take them and learn on the fly when Ramse told me about them, but good lord. I've actually had to keep the place tidy because anything that gets left out will end up somewhere entirely different if I turn my back for a second.

[Once they're both safely inside, she lets them go about their business again. And she does sound very fond of them, if a little frazzled by the learning curve.]

Right this way. Oh, have you brought biscuits as well? Let me just get another plate. [Or just frazzled in general. She waves Jem toward the dining room table, where everything's set for tea, then comes back with a plate as she promised.] Have a seat. Let's at least be somewhat civilised about this, since I started so badly.

[She takes a seat, face laden with the utmost understanding. ] Tell me about it. I've had to start putting my clothes away right away, otherwise Di just goes right to sleep on them. And there's a mountain of cat hair in her wake.

[Cute but a menace. ] D'you need a hand with the tea?

Oh, you've got a cat! [She smiles at that, a kind of dopey expression not like her usual. Cute animals are her weakness and downfall - cute things in general, but cute animals are the worst.] That's what I would've chosen if Arthur and Merlin hadn't come into my life, I think - although Caleb's got Dog, and they're not supposed to get along.

[Welp. There's the point. She might as well stop looking for excuses to bustle around and get to it.]

No, thanks, everything's ready. Cream and sugar there - it's a brilliant little tea set, isn't it? Very proper. The thrift shopping here is top-notch. And it should be ready now, I'll pour. What do you take? [If only she had someone around who could give her unconscious little waves of warmth and calm when she got this wound up, just nudge them into her consciousness without her ever knowing. But of course there's no one like that.]

[Jem notices it all. She's not exactly the most subtle person either when she's got loads on her mind. ]

Celeste, sit down for Christ's sake. You're makin' me dizzy, going round in circles.

[She's helping herself to tea, the corners of her mouth turned up. ]

[She pulls up short, looking like she might get indignant for a moment before finally slumping a little and slipping into a chair.]

Of course. It's been an extremely trying two days, I'm sorry. The more I try to cope, the further I seem to go off the deep end.

[So. Just get to the point.]

Do you know Caleb Holt?

[It takes her a moment to place the name, but: ]

He's the lad who likes Ancient Aliens, right?

[Her smile at that says it all: broad, warm, reminiscing, full of very deep affection.]

Yes. that's him.

He's the mysterious new boyfriend?

[She's just guessing here!!]

He's not - no. No, I'm a million miles from that yet.

[Time to pour herself some tea, settle her nerves.]

We met and - well, we really hit it off on our first day here. He's been the most wonderful mate to me ever since, so much fun and the easiest bloke to get along with that I've ever known. He makes me do stupid, silly things, and I feel like I've always wanted to, but the right person has never been there. Like I've only just gotten to know myself since I've known him.

[This is so, so sappy already. Her cheeks are deeply flushed, something not many people get to see, and she has to take a sip of tea to compose herself.]

But - I never thought anything of it. My two closest mates at school were blokes I had fun with and slept with, and there was never any suggestion of more. None of us would've wanted it. Then Caleb said he loves me.

[She's reaching for the jammy dodgers while Celeste speaks and she chews, thoughtfully, listening very carefully. And then, once she's done, she says (quite bluntly):] It's a bit soon for I love you's, isn't it?

[She doesn't mean to be unkind, it's just - Celeste is new. ]

Is it? [She's genuinely surprised. Eddie didn't say that.] I haven't the first idea how all this goes. Is that really bad?

It's not bad. It's just - I dunno, can you really love someone if it's only been a few months?

[If that. Down go the jammy dodgers and Jem lifts a thumb to chew on it. ] I know people talk about love at first sight but that's bollocks for a start.

Well. I have been in love before, and I knew that quite quickly, but it was just a silly crush at first sight. I'm not a blind romantic, you needn't worry about that. I wouldn't be so bloody terrified about all this if I were.

[It's so hard to explain. When she falls, really falls, there's a connection so deep that it doesn't need time to figure out. And she and Caleb have that, just as she did with Thomas.]

I've never even wanted a boyfriend. I only got thinking about all this because he said that, and no one ever has quite so directly, and it started me wondering. But it wasn't a very serious confession, he didn't ask anything of me and even said that however I felt about it was fine. I told him straight out that I had no idea if I loved him back and he really was fine with it.

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