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[medals]

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To: goatface [d.johnson@saltburnt.co.uk]

goatface says:
tits

goatface says:
now

•]••´º´•» J E M «•´º´••[• says:
where

goatface says:
yours slut

•]••´º´•» J E M «•´º´••[• says:
no?

goatface says:
tits please slut

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no cunt

send

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Comments

god can't believe i instantly dropped the ball on this SORRY feel free to disregard

[semicharmed]

that's a mixed bag for me personally

But in the spirit of fairness, I feel like I should say: 1) thirst traps were not his specific medical recommendation

and 2) I am so sorry for the sexual harassment, this won't sound at all believable but some of my texts lately have been going, like

awry

[medals]

i wouldn't put it past him to have changed the names of all your contacts just to mess with you, btw

he's silly like that

[semicharmed]

[ Goodbye, cake-shaped cannibalism and reliving the second-worst night of his life, Matt has discovered a new form of horror. He quickly goes through his entire phone, from contacts to notes to the music app just to be safe. ]

How do you know all this?

[medals]

we live together lol

i also don't mind the thirst traps :)

[semicharmed]

OH [ Matt types, to the first half of the message, followed by: ] ohh

well. there's more where that came from :)

probably without your cohabitator, but apparently I can't be 100% on that

[medals]

to be fair, i could sent u a thirst trap and he'll probably be in the background in most too
he likes to feel involved that's all and i have to indulge him, i can't say no to his little face

[semicharmed]

Understood. Frankly, I don't know if I could say no to his little face either

though my perception is colored by the fact that he was the guy giving me pain meds for a few days there.

Plus, it would be extremely hypocritical of me to object to his presence in my text messages when I started it

[medals]

he's an acquired taste but he's also, you know, the best ???

do you want a thirst trap tho

[semicharmed]

[ Aww, that's genuinely sweet to read.

But also: ]

yes please